So I was watching the Bachelorette last night. No, I have no qualms about my guilty pleasures. I also eat pasta topped with shredded cheese when I'm hungover and there's no mac and cheese in the house (I call it ghetto mac), I am through the current season of Greek, and I even have an assortment of headbands because of my obsession with Blair Waldorf. Anyway, I don't even like this Ashley chick because of her neurotic low self-esteem. Plus the flat belly and tiny petite stature makes me sick... with jealousy. Anyway, what promises to be "the most dramatic season in Bachelorette history" I'm convinced is a total set up.
In case you missed it (which I will scarcely believe you if you claim not to hate to love this show) the drama started before the guys even showed up. Apparently Miss Neurosis got a call from a former castmate "friend" (yeah, right, they all leave there BFF) that one of the guys who was cast for the show was only there to promote his business. First off, his name is Bentley, obviously he's a huge doucher. Secondly, didn't he watch any of the past seasons of the Bachelorette? It didn't work for Wes or Justin, why would it work for him? Thirdly, OF COURSE there was a snake planted in the grass. The producers know what they're doing here, and they know you're not going to watch unless there's some drama that's going to come to a head at some point.
So of course he shows up and she thinks he's gorgeous. I think he looks like a huge doucher. Then he tells her all about his ex-wife and his kid, completely omitting anything about his work. So now she's convinced that he's here for the right reason and proceeds to give him the final rose. Which may or may not have been her decision (remember the not stupid producers here? Pretty sure they get so many picks every week) I hope she's not serious when she's talking about him. I mean, come on, you've been warned. And of course he's not going to mention his work straight off. I mean, yeah, you've also won free airfare to Vegas but they don't tell you until you get there that it's a whole pitch for a timeshare.
So then at the end of the show they show a preview of the rest of the season of the show. The ginormous doucher is going to stay a long time based on the preview. And Miss Damaged Goods is going to get her heart broken again. And of course I'm going to watch the whole season and text with my mom while I watch. But it just brings me back to the same thing.
Why are women so deaf when it comes to relationships? Why do we ignore red flags and warning signals and even straight up blatant advice from the people who love us? Why do we put up with bad behavior and general douchiness just for a relationship? And further, why do we go for the bad boys? Is it the excitement? The drama? Can't we ever just be happy being treated well? Is it possible to be in a relationship with a so-called "good guy" and still have passion?
But thinking about the so-called "good guy" I have some conflicting feelings. I've met a TON of guys who think they are "good guys". They aren't. They delete phone numbers, ignore phone calls, disappear off the face of the earth whenever they feel like it. They believe that just because they haven't done anything to hurt you they're still "good guys". They don't realize that inaction is just as important as action when it comes to relationships.
At least with the bad boy you know what you're getting into.You know he's going to be elusive and probably dick you over at the end so you can prepare for it. You never get duped with a bad boy.
So my brother attempted to introduce one of his newly single friends to a room full of his law school buddies. Whose number did she go home with? Yeah, the bartender. She knows that he's probably a player and that it's nothing serious. Not all self proclaimed "good guys" announce when you first meet them that they smoke too much pot and have anger issues (and yes, one of the law school buddies actually did that).
So I know this blog is generally supposed to be about being reckless and losing weight and crap, not my general musings so I feel that maybe I should tie it in somehow. I think from now on I'm going to stop trying to find an actual good guy because I kind of feel like that really doesn't exist. Why not just have some fun and find a guy who's just good to me?